Do not say this to kids

Are you a lot of angry and strict, or overwhelms the child with uncritical praise?  Here are tips on how to manage their daily communications.

What should you say and what to absolutely not say when the kids jumping around, rotate, and nag?  Does your child's self a break if you do not brag as much each time?

Ask yourself

The words that are right for one parent, is not necessarily right for another. But now and then it may be wise to check if the words of our votes with their heart. Ask yourself: is this an ok way to talk to my child in? Would I like someone talking to me?

Here are some rules for how parents communicate better with their children.

Things you should not say to the children:

1. No!

There's really nothing wrong with saying "no", so long as it is not used in all contexts.  But it's better to say what you want your child to do, instead of saying what not to do.

 Say rather: "Sit quietly on the chair" in a calm and determined tone, but to roar: "do not tilt the chair." It's easier for the child to understand.

The strict no-one should save for those times when you really want to stop your child from doing something because it's dangerous or because it is about to break something.

But do not scream "no" from the other end of the room about two year old stands with his head up in one of the potted plants and graves. Go over to the child, saying "no, this is not allowed" with certain voice, and take it away.

Maybe you have to say "no" and follow the child over fourteen times in succession, but then you'd better do it. You must be a starling than the child. Something that is not always easy, for a two year old can be very stubborn.

But you have to first say "no", you should try to keep it.

We will be much "no" when the child is at that age that it will investigate the world. However, parents would be happy that the child also keeps out the desire and curiosity.

Here are appreciative of communication is an important consideration.

The characteristics of this way of talking with children, is a willingness to listen to what the child actually says, and then give an answer that is not judgmental or condescending.

For example, when the child is whining about more chocolate, you say: "I know you want more chocolate, but it is not good for your body, so therefore you can not get more".

Then answer the specific request of the child, hold on no-one but also recognize the underlying emotions - lust, anger, joy, sorrow - that exist in the situation.

2. "Mommy is sad"

There should be some bells ringing when you refer yourself in the third person. Use "I" when talking about yourself. It's more personal, and is easier for young children to understand.

Reviews yourself in the third person when talking with your child, for example, says: “My mom does not like you jump the couch "instead of" I do not like that you jump the couch ", it becomes a more general and vague statements.

It becomes difficult for the child to understand the message.

It may be wise to avoid starting the sentence with "you" when talking to the child.

When you say "you're naughty," one defines the child, telling it what it is. Start either the sentence with "I", as in:” I do not like that you throw food on the floor”

When is there anything you think and feel, something personal, and avoid labeling the child?

Children must be allowed to be quite common, and know that it's okay

5. "Never" and "always"

Do not scold the child by constantly saying things like: "Always you shall be so slow," "or:"Never can you be happy when the aunt comes to visit."

We parents tend to repeat ourselves, but to use words like "always" and "never" when we are yelling at children or adults, they usually only in defense and so it ends with the argument.

You react instinctively to any child does, and then you are usually right to react, but think of how you express yourself.

3. So clever you are!

Uncritical praise the child can both go to your head and make it self-centered and self-centered or - even worse creating a sense of requirements for perfection.

Children must be allowed to be ordinary, average, and know that it’s okay.

The goal for parents should be giving children a realistic self-image, not a fantastic.

Instead of praising each drawing the child makes as it should have been painted by Da Vinci, you may be curious about what it actually is trying to achieve, she encourages.

Say for example: "Here I see that you have drawn a sun and spent a lot of yellow, it's a nice color, and I like it too."

When you show interest in what the child has attempted to express.

You can also ask your child what it has character and let it be allowed to tell you about the contents of the drawing. It is this which is to see and hear children.

4. We'll see...

It is easy to reply "we'll see" when your child asks about something that means you must make a decision you can not bear to decide there and then.

Such a response often seems counterproductive, because the child is likely to be even more motivated to ask the same question again until you give a proper answer.

"We'll see" and "maybe, if you are kind", the answers easy sheaths of parents, but that makes kids uncertain. Do not know quite what to answer, be honest and say you need time to think about it. Say that you will have your answer ready for children's television, for example, so you avoid making promises you can not keep, encourage Hamm.

How are you a good role model for your child?

The child learns that no one can be expected to have all the answers to second, and that it is better to say that you can not answer except to say we can not vouch for or that is not true.